20 Excuses i can make, Now that i have a baby!

My best friend got married 2 years before I did. This meant I used to listen to firsthand experience of how life changes after marriage. 1 year later, she broke the news of her pregnancy and then over a period of time our conversations drifted to how life changes post kids.

I would often see her busy (inaccessible being the correct word!) and excuse her from social situations very conveniently. I saw this pattern among many other new parents in my circle and came to conclude that, “how convenient it is to have a baby! You could get out of any situation by – blaming it on the baby!”

So now that I too have a baby, here are 20 excuses I can make a.k.a ways to get out of social obligations without feeling guilty. I am sure to use a few of them in the near future ;)

1.        She is sleeping right now. If she gets up by 1pm, then I can make it, else no.

2.       What? The function is at 5pm? Oh dam, that’s her, sleeping time. Can’t disturb THAT!

3.       She is not feeling well. Classic. Believe me, it always works.

4.      She has already pooped twice in the last 4 hours. Not sure if her stomach is right.

5.       I haven’t showered in 2 days! So returning your call was not even on my priority list.

6.      Sorry I forgot to call you back. You have no idea how sleep deprived I am.

7.       Hey! I just saw your message. What’s up? – **replying 5 days later**

8.      She is teething and being really irritable. I don’t want to create a nuisance at your place.

9.      It’s a 2 hour drive one way? Sorry honey, there is no way she can pull that off.

10.    It’s so hot outside! What if she gets heat rashes? I think I’ll give it a pass.

11.     It’s so cold outside! What if she catches cold? I am definitely giving it a pass.

12.    Can’t do weekdays. I am alone with the baby.

13.    Can’t do weekends. I have loads of laundry to catch up on.

14.    We were about to leave, but she just fell asleep. Can’t afford to wake her up.

15.    Sorry I missed your call. My phone is perpetually on silent mode.

16.    It’s 11:30am, and I haven’t even brushed yet. Why are you being so pushy?

17.    You have a dog? Oh shoot!! She is allergic to dog fur. May be when she grows up?

18.    I have to finish my writing assignment, bathe, cook, clean the house and then hopefully, breathe & catch up on my sleep.

19.    My maid is on a week long holiday. Can we catch up next year?

20.   Cannot make it, because I just don’t want to. #honestly

Did I miss any excuse? Drop your comments in the section below.