How Life Changed after becoming a Mother | #MotherhoodUnplugged


Things happen – you learn some things, you unlearn others - life changes. Travelling, exploring cities, choosing a course of my interest, pursuing chartered accountancy for 4 years and then deciding to not pursue it any further changed me.

Some changes were obvious, but most of these were subtle... something I realized over a period of time. But becoming a mother changed a lot.

As I pushed my baby out of my body, life shifted yet again. My friends, relatives and cousins had warned me of the many changes to expect once the baby came by, but little did I realize how my perspective towards life would also change, and HOW!

Yes, my sleep is not the same as it was before, there is a heap of dirty laundry perpetually, “alone time” doesn’t exist anymore, my body feels much different, stepping out with my little one is a slight struggle and I have to take care of myself – whether I like it or not.

But today I am going to tell you how my perspective towards the many aspects of life changed – so drastically that I cannot help but notice.

1.        When I see babies crying their heart out, in public.
Earlier when I used to travel, and if a toddler was creating nuisance or crying incessantly, then I would easily frown, roll my eyes and cuss the parents in my head. I am also guilty of hissing comments like “Bachche laate kyun hai!” or “How irritating yaar…” under my breath!

But 3 weeks back I had to travel by air for a family emergency, and THAT journey made me realize “Bhai, Halwa nahi hai bachche sambhalna”! There could be 10,000 reasons why a child is crying, and not always are they able to pin-point subtly. The baby could be hungry, upset, sleepy, and uncomfortable, in pain or simply having a bad day.

Now I am much more considerate towards parents who are struggling to calm their child. Instead of rolling my eyes and turning my back, I go ahead and ask them if I can be of any help.

2.       When I realize the world is fukin expensive!
Vaccines? –Need to get every month and costs a BOMMMB!
Diapers? – Need every day/ night and costs a KIDNEY!!!
Day Care/ Keeping a full time help? – Feels impossible to afford!

And these are only the 3 most regular things I have listed. There are many more items to this list, and those having children know what I am talking about.

Before I became a mother, I would casually walk into cafes as and when I wanted, buy cosmetics even when I had a handful and splurge every now and then! But now I think twice (sometimes twenty), before swiping unnecessarily.
Why is raising a child so DAMMM expensive!?

3.      When I realize there’s no point carrying past baggage
I haven’t been the most perfect mother to my daughter. She has got hurt while I was cutting her nails and in the first few weeks, I didn’t hold her well and she ended up uncomfortable and in tears. But today, I know her a little more and am able to manage her well… she laughs in my company, smiles to my non-stop chattering.

She has taught me, that there’s no point in carrying past baggage. Imagine if my daughter started holding a grudge against me? THAT would be a nightmare! I am glad she gave me a hundred second chances. If she can, so can I. isn’t it?

4.      When I want to make this world a better place
Climate change is real. And it does stir me up. I am all for social responsibilities, but before I became a mother, I didn’t really think as much about the world we live in, as much as I think NOW.

It bothers me when a video of glaciers melting/ breaking away goes viral, I get a shiver down my spine, when I see a child begging or see a pregnant lady sitting on the footpath not knowing if she will get her next meal. News about feticide makes me sick and seeing garbage littered everywhere, makes me wonder – what kind of a world am I leaving behind for my daughter?

5.      When I realize my parents are growing old
I had always looked at my parents as energetic-immortals! Like, they never get sick or old or frail. They have always been young, energetic and full of life.

But after I moved to my parent’s house with my new born, I could see my mother’s struggle of being on her feats the entire time, as much as my father wanted to stay up all night with the baby, after a few days - I could see him grow irritable, feel feverish and in dire need of rest. My mother ended up with a muscle spasm in her lower back and had to opt for multiple physiotherapy sessions.

While i was so busy living my life, adoring my little one… that had I almost forgot that even my parents are growing older. And frankly, this thought scares me.  

6.      When I choose a healthier lifestyle
As a breastfeeding mother, I am pretty much forced into having a healthy lifestyle. I consciously opt for salads, over burgers. Hot coffee over frappe. More fruits and less fried. More proteins and lesser sugar.

I find myself making such choices on a daily basis and whether I like it or not… A healthier lifestyle is what I choose, because what I consume is what my daughter will also consume.

Are you also a parent? Tell me how parenthood has changed you as a person, in the comments below!

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